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"Just released a fart that sounded like the beginning of 21 Questions by 50 Cent" @M_uckley

-I know an actual living and breathing human person who truly believes he is the reincarnation of Kurt Cobain

-When I was growing up the only thing to do for fun in my town was to smoke weed behind town hall or go tear it up at Jordan's Furniture

-I desperately want to be a hat person but it is not my destiny in this life

-I wish people still used the word "grody"

-Janelle Monae's gorgeous face makes me sweat anxiously

-If I had a dollar for every time someone told me I looked like their cousin or friend I could buy myself a new face